For the love of God

I love you Baba :P Oh have I lost it or what!! My emotional ping pong with God thus continues.. Just when I had lost all hope, He comes back and saves me. Living in hope and dangling by my faith, I continue my battle. My savior, my hope, my faith, my love, my Babaji xoxo

Do you believe in God?

Faith?? How easy or difficult is it to lose faith in someone or for that matter, lose faith in God?! Thats my bone of contention today. Yes I was one of those staunch believers..no matter what happens, God is always there watching over me..he will pull me out of my miseries one day..let karma play out its role and once my karma is done..happy days will be here once again. Yeah yeah I know I sound verrryy stupid..but thats exactly how Ive been thinking of late. But finally Ive realised..there's no such thing! I believe we've been handed out our joys n sorrows randomly. So some of us have ended up receiving more than their fair share of miserable moments than others, and theres nobody up there to balance it out. I have realised the sheer futility of going to temples, mosques, churches, etc. No matter what you do or how hard you pray, nothing seems to improve. One moment life was full of happy moments, future plans, glory days and the very next its nothing less than doom! How do you manage to keep the faith in such a scenario..its not that I didn't try. I held on to my God for a very long time, only to be pushed back in a corner with my grief and dejection. Finally, I gave up. It was not a voluntary step. Its just happened on its own. Something just died within. Now there's no faith, just a glimmer of hope that maybe destiny will take a turn for good and things will work out one day. But surely, God has no part to play in it.