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Thursday, December 15, 2011

Are Best Friends Forever!

"False friends are like our shadow, keeping close to us while we walk in the sunshine but leaving us when we cross into the shade.”


Are Best Friends Forever?
Its surprising how our perceptions, ideas, ideals change as we grow up. Life unfolds in so many unexpected and dramatic ways. Teaches you so many lessons...some sweet, some bitter but each lesson worth having learnt. I used to think that friendship is a pure, beautiful, sacred relationship and lucky are ones who have that one person (or more than one for some lucky ones) they can call a 'FRIEND'. Who is a friend? To me, its someone who makes you feel that you are not alone in your sorrows and never lets you cry alone. Someone who doubles your joys by being there with you in happy times. Someone whom you fall back on when theres nothing else left to fall back on. Your friend is someone who has all the rights over you...to hug you, to judge you, to scold you, to teach you, to love you, to get angry with you and so on and so forth. You love your mom, dad, brother, sister...dont you? Arent you supposed to love your friend the same way and of course expect the same in return?


But no, cold facts of life - you may love someone from the bottom of your heart and chances are that they will break your heart. It happens all the time, doesn't it? 

What's surprising is that not only are romantic relationships causing heartbreaks all over, but so are failed friendships. Yes its true. After all it all boils down to human nature. If there are people who will take their romantic partners for granted then how can we expect that these people will be good friends with someone.  Its only when the going gets tough and  comes the true test of their 'friendship', when suddenly you realize that your 'friend' is not-so-willing to be a part of the shitty phase of your life. Its the hardest time of your life and your BEST friend is nowhere around. You thought that this is that one person that you will not have to explain your pain to. But reality is far from it.  This person chooses to slowly slip out of your life and leaves you alone to face your misery. The move is so smooth that you won't even come to know of it at first. Your mind will not register the change at first, neither will you be able to see the truth. This is because your trust in your friend is paramount and not even in your wildest dreams would you have thought that your best pal would actually not be there for you at this time. Boy, does it break your heart!  


Well, shit happens I guess. You get hurt...people you love the most hurt you. There are times when they unknowingly do so, and if that's the case, you are still lucky because they don't know that they have hurt you and once they do, chances are that they may tell you how sorry they are and all will be well after that. But then there are others who are selfish and have been using you all this while. One day they show their true colors. The truth will hit hard when it strikes you and you will think that you have been wronged. You heart will be broken and you will have no one to blame for the blow that your heart has taken. It hurts but I will say get up, chin up, wish your 'pal' all the best and move on a wiser person in life.


No need to carry the baggage of hatred and I-was-wronged with you. Be sorry that a friendship didn't turn out to be what you thought it was but be thankful for the wisdom it has given you. Wisdom to be able to choose friends more wisely now, to hopefully be able to differentiate the fake from the original ones. Isn't life all about growing up every twist and turn after all? Know yourself and be true to yourself. if you are pure in your heart and if you are willing to be an honest and true lover or a friend yourself, then eventually life will present them to you when the time is right. And when that happens, you would know that this time its for the keeps because you already have come past the wrong ones. You held your ground in those times and came out a much stronger person. Others were shallow and you were not. They were in the wrong but you were not. You played the part of the true lover, the true friend but they chose to deceive you...took you for granted. That's their style, not yours. You cried, you were hurt but you were pure, you were true, you were honest. Think of them as life's tough lessons but be happy that you learnt so much from them and now its much more difficult for someone to take you for a ride...thanks to them. You have grown as a human being, they are still the same...shallow, conniving and petty. Remember that future is unfolding every moment and its for sure that good things, good people will come your way because you chose to be good yourself. As simple as that!